It is simply a normal part of existence from one state to another. It is an inevitable experience that everybody goes through. I have been taught that when a loved ones dies, they’re supposed to be in a better place, so why do I fear it so much? My fear is caused by my thoughts, so I should be able to change my thoughts so that I can change my fear into something else. I also feel anxiety, but I remind myself that it is caused by my thoughts and my concepts in my mind. I should be able to manipulate my thinking so that I can be in a more peaceful state of mind. It has been difficult to empty my mind so that I’m not always lost in my thoughts. I am not my thoughts. I am not my feelings. I’m not sure if they are actually “mine.”
So why do I let them dictate my life? Is it really “my” life? Or am I just part of the collective set of consciousness where every human being shares with me? And if so, should I even use the word “I” at all to define this consciousness that is experienced at the moment? This moment is all that I really have. This moment where I am writing this post. The eternal presence that cannot be taken away, not even in death. Or can it? Is the source of my fear the thought that death can take away the eternal presence? Or simply the the fear of the unknown?
There’s no conclusion to this post. There’s no answer or solution but I can provide at the moment. Just questions to ponder.