Death and Sickness everywhere



In my  personal life, I have heard and seen people getting sick and dying … Mainly because of cancer. These are the moments in life where I pause and reflect more about this present existence .
What are we? What purpose brought us to this existence ? Is our awareness of this thing we call life accurate? What awareness will we have , if any, after our bodies die?
No wonder people tend to believe in the afterlife.. To give us hope about this mysterious state of being.

Life goes on, but what exactly is this life? We hear all the time that this famous person and that other person died.  But what does it mean for “me” to die ?  It happens everywhere, and to everybody.  Yet we rarely think about it happening to us.

What would it be like ?  I may find out when my heart stops beating.   Or I may not even realize I have died… Like when I fall asleep and don’t realize it until I wake up the next morning . I don’t know.

But they know. Those who have passed away know.

I shall experience it too.


The Beauty of the Present Moment

Every thought , every idea we have and memories, are not in the present moment.  We cannot experience the present moment if we are constantly thinking about other things, ideas … The only thing we can know for sure… what we can be certain of is what we are experiencing right now.

Everything else is an illusion .   A fantasy.  A fabrication of the mind.  Even if our thoughts and ideas seem like they are tangible and sometimes objective, the reality is that that they are simply subjective ideas.  Which can then create anxiety, sadness, and resentments.

Not all thoughts trigger anxiety and sadness; but being in the present moment never triggers these feelings.  Being in the present moment can only bring peace.

We can make ourselves feel peace and tranquility by simply being in the present.  Only with patience and practice can this be achieved.  As soon as we allow ourselves to focus on our thoughts, then we are prone to uncomfortable feelings.  We may start feeling insecure.  Sad.  Angry.  Anxious.

Focusing back in the present… the here and now, will bring contentment… and peace.

That’s the beauty of the Present Moment.




  No matter what we do in our lives, we are worthy of respect.

We are human beings who deserve to be treated with dignity and care.

In spite of our actions…. no matter if we do good or evil,

we are worthy.  We are valuable and important.

God, Higherpower, Universe, or whatever we call it,

values us… cares for us… loves us,  no matter what we do.

So, in order to live this worthiness, first we need to recognize it.

We need to embrace our worthiness, simply because we are humans.

Not because of what we do.   Not because of our intentions.

Our actions do not determine our worthiness.

It is not about our actions.  It is about who we are.

That’s the good news.

A New Perspective to be Mindful

Have you noticed that, when you visit a particular setting for the first time, either a new town, a new house, or a new park, that the first impression is always different than the impression you have on the same place a few minutes later?

I think this happens because our expectations increase once we become more familiarized with the environment.   And the more expectations we have, the more we are distracted by our thoughts.  But when we are  faced with a new environment, we are more likely to stop thinking and observe more.  Which leads to mindfulness.

I don’t know about you, but I  realized that when I make the attempt to perceive a familiar environment as a new and unfamiliar setting , I am inclined to doing mindfulness.  I discovered this when I visit a new setting.  Somehow it changes my perspective the more I become familiar with it.  When visiting a new place, there are less expectations and, therefore, less thinking.  There is more observation and attention to details.  There is more accepting.   And time seems to slow down.

When we are more familiarized with the same place, our expectations increase, and so does our thinking .  There is less observation and less attention to details.  Time will then seem to go faster.

When I try to focus on the details of my surroundings, such as the street and the trees, and try to perceive it as a new experience  , time will seem to slow down .  It is the same as living in the here and now.  Being more mindful.

When it is evening, I try to imagine it being morning.

Or when it is windy and rainy outside, I perceive it as being in a tropical island (which I am not but I wish I were.)

It is almost as if I can change the perception of my surroundings in order to make it soothing.

And be more mindful.


Prone to suffering

Every time we say ” I want …” and then you can fill in the blank,  we are prone to suffering.  Every time we even think that we want or wish something, we are setting ourselves up to suffering.

By suffering I mean the experience of disillusionment and disappointment.  We may feel sad, angry , or frustrated.  We put our hopes and expectations so high that we end up falling down .  Hard.

This is because we don’t always have or obtain what we wish for or what we desire.  So we end up suffering by wishing to have what we don’t always have. cEven with the littlest thing , such as a particular kind of clothing,  a way of life, or any possession, will open up the possibility of some kind ofdisappointment  at the end.  It is inevitable.

So what am I saying?  Am I saying that we should not  wish or want anything to avoid suffering? This is not about shoulds or should not.  It is about recognizing that whenever we suffer or feel  disillusioned or disappointed, it is because of an underlying wish or want that has not been satisfied.  If we define ourselves based on our possessions and accomplishments, we are fooling ourselves.  We are creating our own delusions.  We are setting up ourselves to suffering.

Are we entities that only live to obtain what we desire?  I read somewhere that true happiness is wanting what I already have.
I understand  that our basic instinct is to survive, to prevent death.   But this is based on needs,  not wants.  If we are hungry or cold, and do not eat or find shelter, then we suffer physically.  This is natural and necessary to survive.  But when it comes to possession, success, fame, and other “artificial” desires, then it is not based on survival.   It leads us to disappointment.  To suffering.

Never  Mindful 

I have never been completely mindful. Most of my life I have identified with my thoughts, perceptions, and assumptions.  This blog is mainly about my ever ongoing  journey into a more mindful lifestyle.

As I write this post, I am waiting in a car shop for my van’s tire to be repaired.  I can try to be mindful , but it is hard to do with a TV blasting in front of me, cars driving by the window , and hundreds of thoughts about all the things going on in my life, including work , the bills, appointments for my child, etc. It is almost an endless ordeal when I try to quiet down my mind.  It is almost like trying to stop water from falling from a waterfall .  It is also difficult to take deep breaths and relax my muscles when most of what I do is tense up and take shallow breaths.

But I still recognize the importance of managing my time wisely and continue to try to do mindfulness .

Two weeks ago, I went with my family to pick up strawberries at a local farm . First I was hesitant about it.  But while I walked on he farm and picked up fresh strawberries , I began to appreciate this simple yet important task.  I was being mindful .  My family and I enjoyed it.

I have also been able to be mindful whenever I draw.  It is relaxing and enjoyable .  I try to be aware of my surrounding whenever I see myself having to wait for something.  It is an opportunity to be in the here and now.

So even though I have not been completely and fully mindful, I plan to continue to be more aware of the present moment. To be gradually more mindful.

Feeding the ego

How did you feed the ego today..?

Did you make sure that everyone has noticed your skills by overemphasizing them ?

Or did you try to put someone else down to hide your own limitations?

Perhaps you made fun of others simply because you don’t fully understand them.

Or maybe you hide your feelings from others to prevent being hurt again.

Did you try to make other laugh to ensure you are accepted or that you belong  ?

Did you dress up flamboyantly so that others overlook your undesired image?

Did you mistreat or abuse others to hide your own weaknesses ?

Or maybe you pretend to agree with someone else’s inappropriate statement to avoid bring ridiculed?

Did you complete reading this list of self-evaluating questions , or did you stop reading because of fear of exposing your ego to your real self?